I don’t consider myself a funny person, nor do I consider myself an expert in the observation of human nature. But someone who can put these 2 things together is destined to be a popular funny-person – someone like Jerry Seinfeld, or in the case of Christian culture, Tim Hawkins. As I was browsing some other blogs this morning, I came across some things that other people did that I realized were actually pretty funny, and I’d like to share them with you. I will try to keep away from sounding like I am poking fun at them – that may be what I am doing, but I’ll try not to appear to be doing it.
- Make a list of 1 thing. Have you ever read something someone wrote, and to strengthen their argument, they start a list of points that they are trying to make? That’s pretty common – and very organized. This morning I was reading the comments to a blog I enjoy reading every day, when I came across where someone was going to compare two things, and they were going to give each thing a letter, like answer choices on a multiple choice question test. Something like “A human being is usually born as A) a male, or B) a female.” The only problem was, this commenter stopped with the letter ‘A’. So it was more like “A human being is usually born as A) a person.” That doesn’t make any sense… That sentence would be perfectly fine without the ‘A’ in there. I’m sure I have probably done this before. Perhaps we get so into making points when we push our side of arguments that we sometimes forget that we have only one point. I think that this is A) funny….
- Use 2 words that mean the same thing to emphasize a point. When I was in 7th grade I was in the band. Not a cool rock band – the school band. I played trombone, but that’s not really important to what I am getting at here. One day, 2 boys in the percussion section thought it would be funny to write something in permanent ink on the back wall of the band hall. They wrote “Kelly is a gay dike.” I will never forget when they got caught – the band director of course was very upset, but in his long, loud tirade of chewing them out, he poked a little fun at their ignorance. He told them that these 2 words mean the same thing, so their attempt at making fun of this girl named Kelly actually just accentuated their own redundant stupidity. I’m not sure he put it that way, but it was great to see their faces when they realized he was right. Another example of this phenomenon – when in high school, some boys in the athletics department had started spreading some rumors about the head coach. I don’t remember what the rumors were, but he gathered all the athletics boys together and had a little chat with us. In his speech, he said “I don’t know why you are spreading false rumors that just aren’t true…” False rumors that aren’t true? Would that mean that the rumors actually were true? Do two lefts make a right? This has left me confusingly confounded…
- Use the phrase “Yeah, but…”. This is one I’m guilty of. It’s way to change the focus of a conversation back on yourself, and I think this one might actually border on rude. I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking “yeah, but it’s effective!” Sure, it may be effective, but it’s also a two-word way of saying “I completely dismiss what you are saying, and I will now dive head first into my own argument which is of much more importance.” The “yeah” part is the bad part – it’s the part that makes you sound like you are admitting that they are right, when in actuality it is the part you’re throwing in so that you don’t sound so disagreeable, while with the very next word (“but”) you disagree with them. So you’re thinking “in this very paragraph, you just typed ‘Sure, it may be effective, but…’ which is doing the same basic thing, right?” To which I reply “Yeah, but that’s different…”