Things I Hate About Myself, Part 3 of ∞

If I tell you what I am about to tell you, you have to promise to keep it a secret. You can’t tell anybody!  If I find out you told someone, I’m gonna…I’m gonna…well, you just wait and see what I’m gonna do…

Okay, here goes.  I cry at movies.

Yep, go ahead, get all your giggles out now, because in a moment it will no longer be tolerable. I, a 29 year old man, cry at movies.  As you can see, it’s not something I’m proud of.  I wouldn’t be so uptight about it, except that I cry at movies that my wife doesn’t even cry at.  We watched The Blind Side the other night. I cried…  And not because Sandra Bullock looks good as a blond either!  But because it was such a heartwarming story. My wife, though… Dry as a desert.  Not a single tear.  She tries to make me feel better by telling me that she just doesn’t cry at movies, but I would have to humbly remind her that when we were dating we went and saw Pearl Harbor in the theater, and afterward she cried like a baby out in the lobby.  That’s actually a pretty funny story – we were with her parents, and her dad saw someone he knew, but we were all there trying to help her stop crying. It was awesome.

But back to me. I know that it’s not really culturally acceptable to be such a lactimally prolific male. I looked online for what people thought about it, and I came across this site, where I found the following poll results when people were asked “When is it ok for a man to cry?”

I know it’s kind of hard to see, but if you really scrunch up your eyes and look close, you can see that only 12.22% of people think it is acceptable for a man to cry during a sad movie.  Of course, I’m not sure I can trust a poll where more people think it is acceptable for a man to cry when he cuts himself shaving (5.56%) than do that think it’s acceptable for a man to cry when he has a gunshot or stab wound (2.22%).  And a gunshot wound is only moderate pain? Have they ever been shot?  I haven’t, but I did get punched in the eye once, and that was pretty severe, so I think anything that penetrates my dermal tissue should fall under extreme pain.  I’m just saying…

When I’m watching something sad – it doesn’t have to be sad, even the Soup Nazi episode from Seinfeld will do the trick – I try to remind myself that even Jesus cried (Luke 19:41; John 11:35). Peter wept “bitterly” when Jesus pointed out that he had denied him 3 times (Matthew 26:75). And John, the beloved disciple, wept and wept (twice means he did more than just tear up) when no one was found who was worthy to open the scroll or even look inside it in his end-times vision (Revelation 5:4).  My Bible study right now is over Joseph, and he wept in private when he was moved by the sight of his younger brother (Genesis 43:30). All these men were manly men of the Bible, and they all cried at some point or another.  So I don’t think it’s so bad that I cried when Simba’s dad died on The Lion King, or that I sobbed uncontrollably while rolling around on the floor and screaming “Why, oh why? It’s just not fair!!!” after Macaulay Culkin’s character died in My Girl.

So what do you think? Is it acceptable for a man to cry at a sad movie or TV show?



Filed under Random/Funny Thoughts, Spiritual Thoughts

4 responses to “Things I Hate About Myself, Part 3 of ∞

  1. Kim


    If I could stop laughing I would respond I swear. OK. Composure.

    First- I bawl like a baby in My Girl… when he dies and when she reads her poem to him… so disgustingly sad. So that one gets a pass for me.

    Second- my brother is a big bawl baby, so I am not unfamiliar with this breed of men. And as long as you don’t take any embarassment you may feel out on those around you, I have no issues at all with it.

    God gave us emotions for a reason, to use them. That has to be the funniest thing God did with me. I am an uber tough girl, tom boy, especially around those I’m not close to. God turned me into a bawl baby when it comes to him. When I am really in the zone singing, praying, talking, listening, when I truly feel the Holy Spirit… I am guaranteed to be crying like a baby (minus the howls).

    So you are in good company my friend.

    • Jeremy

      It’s weird, because I haven’t always been this way. When I was a kid (physically – technically I’m still a kid maturity-wise), I used to never cry. I didn’t cry when I got spankings. I didn’t cry at sad movies, I didn’t cry at funerals, I didn’t really cry at anything. But I’m noticing that since my daughter was born, I’ve changed in a lot of ways. And one of those ways is my feminine emotions. The night before last we watched the movie 2012, about the end of world or whatever, and when the Indian scientist (I think his name was Dr. Satnam Tsurutani) who discovered the problems to begin with was standing on that hill with his wife and young son, and that huge tidal wave was about to kill them, I just lost it. At first I cried, but then I got mad. Now I hate that movie. I’m going to start a petition to get it banned from Netflix…

      I agree about crying during worship. Every once in a while I will get moved during worship to the point that tears come to my eyes. I love that…

      Thanks for your comment!

      • Kim

        LOL… that was sad in 2012, but didn’t cry there.

        As for the manifestation of these manly tears since you became a dad, that explains it all. God turned you into a crier so you wouldn’t laugh at your baby girl when she cries at silly stuff. I’ve done that with my oldest before and trust me when I say my friend that it is well worth the effort to restrain yourself from laughing. That turned into an hour long comforting session where I profusely apologized for being such a dunderhead.

        I’m enjoying your writing a lot. Keep it up.

        • Jeremy

          You make a great point! Just last night I was getting on to my daughter for something, and of course she was whining, and then she said something (I don’t remember what…), and I started laughing. That’s like the worst thing you can do when you are trying to discipline your child. I covered my mouth so I wouldn’t go straight to H-E-double hockey sticks… Luckily my wife was nearby, so we just tag-teamed it – she jumped in while I went to the restroom to compose myself. Good times…

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